Strong leadership is a hard job. . . demanding and seemingly never-ending. The temptation is to believe that to be truly good at it - one just has to keep going and going. That's not the case. . .strong leaders need to have the ability to constantly challenge themselves. . . and give themselves a break.
Here are a few things in which I have found comfort:
Sometimes, You Just Need to Take Yourself Out of the Game. In sports, the highest performing players seldom play the entire game. . . I believe the same dynamic should be true in the workplace. To continue to be a strong player. . . sometimes you just need to take yourself out of the game. If you don't, you are subjecting yourself to dramatically diminishing returns on your investment of time. You need to rest and re-charge so that you can continue to excel. The good news here is taking yourself out of the game will force the critical subjects of delegation and management responsibility to your next reporting level and help develop your bench.
You Don't Need to be Right All of the Time. Sometimes we place such high pressure on ourselves that we need to be right, even to the point of defending our actions that, quite candidly, were not right. The good news here is that NO ONE is right 100% of the time so it's not even in the realm of realism that you should always be right. So, give yourself a break - it you made a mistake, or an error - you're human. You can own it, learn from it and move forward.
The People Who Work for You Can Do More. We get so inside of our heads, and our own task management, that sometimes we don't give any credence to the idea that the people who work for us can do more. One of the important lessons I learned is that I was often acting as a "work dam" preventing work that should have been done by other managers from flowing to them by doing it all myself. They, consequently, were not gaining valuable experience they needed. The good news is that many people do want more responsibility and the only way they can learn that is through actually doing. In other words . . .delegate.
You May be Doing a Better Job Than You Give Yourself Credit For. At times, we can be our own worst critics. Let's face it - it is the norm in most enterprises to call out that which isn't right and to just take for granted all of the good work that is done. The key to good leadership is the balance of being able to recognize that which can be done better and that which was done so well it is worth repeating. Take a few minutes, sit back, and see all that you have done that has gone right. It will do your soul good.
The good news in all of this is that you are the person who has the most power in making these things happen. So, for crying out loud, give yourself a break - you deserve it.
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Brent Frerichs is the author of "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" available for e-readers, tablets and PCs on Amazon Kindle.
Thursday, January 30, 2014
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
About Richard Sherman. . .and Context
Certainly it would be a bad thing if I were the only person on planet Earth who didn't write about Richard Sherman's post-game interview with Erin Andrews. In case you missed it, the Seattle Seahawk had a fairly explosive monologue regarding himself and an opposing team member. (Also let me point it, he completely avoided using an expletive - and in that regard was way more classy than any of The Real Housewives.)
Not being silly enough to make a judgment call on Sherman's behavior, instead let me make an observation. Whether falling into the category of "we're just so appalled he said that, " or "c'mon already, it was a realistic statement," most commentators had this common, they talked about the context of Sherman's comment.
Whether referencing the game, Sherman's relationship with the opposing team's coach, something that had been said between Sherman and the opposing team member or the atmosphere of football in general. . .nearly everyone mentioned the value of considering context.
And that's what we should remember in the workplace: it is always wise to remember context.
First of all, realize that you don't know everything: when things come out of the blue, I have learned (through bitter experience) it is so much better to limit the reaction, find out the context of the situation and then constructively react with a plan of action.
And then there is the stuff that you don't know, that you really have no business asking about: often when someone responds to us brusquely it may have nothing to do with us personally, but instead is rooted in that individual's personal life. You don't know, and you don't need to know about personal information that may impact an individual's response: relationship troubles, financial challenges, family matters are all context to the person who was rude to you - and, unfortunately, that context shaded their remark to you.
Realize that not everybody knows what you know: your reaction to a situation, without context, may be deemed strange or reactionary. Be very aware that you often know more information than others, so you need to modulate your reaction in front of others.
Put things back into context for your team: there have been many times I had to counsel team members regarding someone's reaction, and to constructively do that, I had to use context. "I know he sounded impatient to you and I'm sorry about that - but you were just recently assigned this project and what you don't know is that he had been asking for this information from your predecessor and was not getting a satisfactory answer."
Context is something very important to remember - it allows you to react to and understand situations with intelligence - and that, in turn, passes intelligence to your team.
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Brent Frerichs is the author of "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" available for e-readers, tablets and PCs from Amazon Kindle.
Not being silly enough to make a judgment call on Sherman's behavior, instead let me make an observation. Whether falling into the category of "we're just so appalled he said that, " or "c'mon already, it was a realistic statement," most commentators had this common, they talked about the context of Sherman's comment.
Whether referencing the game, Sherman's relationship with the opposing team's coach, something that had been said between Sherman and the opposing team member or the atmosphere of football in general. . .nearly everyone mentioned the value of considering context.
And that's what we should remember in the workplace: it is always wise to remember context.
First of all, realize that you don't know everything: when things come out of the blue, I have learned (through bitter experience) it is so much better to limit the reaction, find out the context of the situation and then constructively react with a plan of action.
And then there is the stuff that you don't know, that you really have no business asking about: often when someone responds to us brusquely it may have nothing to do with us personally, but instead is rooted in that individual's personal life. You don't know, and you don't need to know about personal information that may impact an individual's response: relationship troubles, financial challenges, family matters are all context to the person who was rude to you - and, unfortunately, that context shaded their remark to you.
Realize that not everybody knows what you know: your reaction to a situation, without context, may be deemed strange or reactionary. Be very aware that you often know more information than others, so you need to modulate your reaction in front of others.
Put things back into context for your team: there have been many times I had to counsel team members regarding someone's reaction, and to constructively do that, I had to use context. "I know he sounded impatient to you and I'm sorry about that - but you were just recently assigned this project and what you don't know is that he had been asking for this information from your predecessor and was not getting a satisfactory answer."
Context is something very important to remember - it allows you to react to and understand situations with intelligence - and that, in turn, passes intelligence to your team.
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Brent Frerichs is the author of "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" available for e-readers, tablets and PCs from Amazon Kindle.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
What Makes You Successful (and What Doesn't)
Based on the premise that we are, for the most part, successful - it's probably worth a few minutes to think about what makes us successful. . . and what doesn't.
I'm a worrier. . .and I'm really, really "good" at it. I like to claim it's built into my DNA from a childhood in the Midwest. Many vacations we would be 45 minutes down the road when my mother's brow would furrow and she would chirp "I wonder if I shut off the iron?" With images of the house going up in flames we would turn around our be-finned boat of a car and head for home to turn off the iron - which, as you can imagine, had indeed been turned off before leaving home the first time.
So, my excuse is that it's genetic. Because I'm successful, somewhere built into my subconscious is the hook that worrying is part of what makes me successful. In fact, I'm more successful when I don't worry as much - but it takes a very conscious act on my part to differentiate the two.
It's worth thinking about - what are the items that either consciously or subconsciously are built into your success formula that ultimately you are not well-served by? Is it working such long hours that you don't have a life? Is it cheating your own health? Is it a control demeanor when, in fact, a more collaborative approach would serve you and everyone else better? Is it being so preoccupied with projects that you don't spend quality time with your staff? Heck - it could be anything.
The key is awareness. Invest a few moments, on a regular basis, in thinking about all of the components that you believe make up your success - including the ones that, in truth, make you less successful.
Then. . .edit.
The undesirable elements don't go away by wishing. . .it's an active decision. It's also a decision that may take some time to implement fully. By making the decision, however, that you can actively edit things that ultimately don't serve you well. . .you will become. . .well. . . more successful.
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Brent Frerichs is the author of "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" available for e-reading from Amazon Kindle.
I'm a worrier. . .and I'm really, really "good" at it. I like to claim it's built into my DNA from a childhood in the Midwest. Many vacations we would be 45 minutes down the road when my mother's brow would furrow and she would chirp "I wonder if I shut off the iron?" With images of the house going up in flames we would turn around our be-finned boat of a car and head for home to turn off the iron - which, as you can imagine, had indeed been turned off before leaving home the first time.
So, my excuse is that it's genetic. Because I'm successful, somewhere built into my subconscious is the hook that worrying is part of what makes me successful. In fact, I'm more successful when I don't worry as much - but it takes a very conscious act on my part to differentiate the two.
It's worth thinking about - what are the items that either consciously or subconsciously are built into your success formula that ultimately you are not well-served by? Is it working such long hours that you don't have a life? Is it cheating your own health? Is it a control demeanor when, in fact, a more collaborative approach would serve you and everyone else better? Is it being so preoccupied with projects that you don't spend quality time with your staff? Heck - it could be anything.
The key is awareness. Invest a few moments, on a regular basis, in thinking about all of the components that you believe make up your success - including the ones that, in truth, make you less successful.
Then. . .edit.
The undesirable elements don't go away by wishing. . .it's an active decision. It's also a decision that may take some time to implement fully. By making the decision, however, that you can actively edit things that ultimately don't serve you well. . .you will become. . .well. . . more successful.
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Brent Frerichs is the author of "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" available for e-reading from Amazon Kindle.
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Practical Advice for Dealing with the Insecure
There are few traits that are as damaging to a work team as personal and professional insecurity. It is a quicksand that swallows individuals; it becomes a sinkhole of inefficiency.
At first, it may be difficult to recognize the insecure individual; they are usually covered with a (very thin) veneer of seemingly endless ego and bravado. Their constant use of any derivative of the first person ("Me," "I," "Me," "My," "Me," oh, and "Me") is usually a dead giveaway as is their lack of trust and seeming inability to get along with the rest of the world. You will also find that the insecure team player creates a lot of drama. Why? It brings the focus to them versus another team player or another issue.
What is the danger here? The insecure individual often is singularly concerned about how everything impacts them - consequently, the efforts of the team and the enterprise goals are diminished. Not only does this invalidate the remainder of the workplace (which is a terrible waste of payroll, not to mention human talent) but it also gets in the way of true accomplishment.
So, what do you do?
If you work with one of these individuals, do not get "sucker punched" into playing their game. Don't engage, but instead, play the team's game. Make sure that the remainder of the team moves forward to meet their goals. You need to ignore the desire of one for constant attention and constantly re-create focus around the business and the remainder of the workplace.
Speaking of the remainder of the workplace, work diligently to assure that others' voices are heard and validated. Insecure individuals can set the stage and culture that everything is about them - and the rest of the workplace tends to believe it. You need to, more than in a normal situation, pay attention to and praise the remainder of the team.
If you are in a position to coach an insecure individual - you need to walk the fine line of praising that which is truly praiseworthy and consistently work to eliminate that which is unnecessary. Focus the conversation to the work at hand and the goals of the team. Consider professional coaching for the individual - and I mean true, at-the-heart-of-the-matter personal and professional development; in extreme situations, make it a condition of employment.
In a team environment, there is too much at stake to allow the insecurities of one to diminish the satisfaction of many. Focus on mutual goals with an fair emphasis on each member of the contributing team.
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Brent Frerichs is the author of "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" available from Amazon Kindle. If you are a member of Amazon Prime, you can read this book for free.
At first, it may be difficult to recognize the insecure individual; they are usually covered with a (very thin) veneer of seemingly endless ego and bravado. Their constant use of any derivative of the first person ("Me," "I," "Me," "My," "Me," oh, and "Me") is usually a dead giveaway as is their lack of trust and seeming inability to get along with the rest of the world. You will also find that the insecure team player creates a lot of drama. Why? It brings the focus to them versus another team player or another issue.
What is the danger here? The insecure individual often is singularly concerned about how everything impacts them - consequently, the efforts of the team and the enterprise goals are diminished. Not only does this invalidate the remainder of the workplace (which is a terrible waste of payroll, not to mention human talent) but it also gets in the way of true accomplishment.
So, what do you do?
If you work with one of these individuals, do not get "sucker punched" into playing their game. Don't engage, but instead, play the team's game. Make sure that the remainder of the team moves forward to meet their goals. You need to ignore the desire of one for constant attention and constantly re-create focus around the business and the remainder of the workplace.
Speaking of the remainder of the workplace, work diligently to assure that others' voices are heard and validated. Insecure individuals can set the stage and culture that everything is about them - and the rest of the workplace tends to believe it. You need to, more than in a normal situation, pay attention to and praise the remainder of the team.
If you are in a position to coach an insecure individual - you need to walk the fine line of praising that which is truly praiseworthy and consistently work to eliminate that which is unnecessary. Focus the conversation to the work at hand and the goals of the team. Consider professional coaching for the individual - and I mean true, at-the-heart-of-the-matter personal and professional development; in extreme situations, make it a condition of employment.
In a team environment, there is too much at stake to allow the insecurities of one to diminish the satisfaction of many. Focus on mutual goals with an fair emphasis on each member of the contributing team.
Like it? Share it!
Brent Frerichs is the author of "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" available from Amazon Kindle. If you are a member of Amazon Prime, you can read this book for free.
Thursday, January 2, 2014
The Jigsaw Puzzle
Based on Facebook postings, we are not the only household that has a tradition of doing a jigsaw puzzle during the holidays. It's a great opportunity to spend quiet, quality time with friends and family. . .and it also provides great parallels to solving the puzzles of teamwork.
Start with a framework. It's a good idea that most people begin a jigsaw by trying to put together the framework first. . .the same is true at work. Before beginning anything, put together the framework, or the foundation, that will house your work. Determine the parameters and systems that you will need. . .and you will have a much easier time solving the puzzle. (Also realize that, similar to a jigsaw puzzle, some of the framework that you thought belonged one place - truly belongs in another - in other words - be flexible!)
Sort through the issues. Most everyone sorts the pieces before putting the puzzle together. So it is with work. . .find the likenesses, the things that go together and the similarities will let you to move forward.
Turn the elements around. My experience with jigsaws is that I will look at several pieces one way for quite awhile. . .and it isn't until I turn them around that I begin to see how they fit together. I have found the same to be true in the workplace. We can stare at the same old situation for a long time, but it isn't until we start to turn it around, and look at it differently, that we are able to make progress.
Keep the big picture in focus. While trying to solve a jigsaw, how often do you refer to the master picture of the entire puzzle put together? Same should be true with teams - always keep the big picture in mind as you put together the small pieces that build a bigger element.
Working together helps you solve the puzzle faster. Enough said.
Communication is key to success. "Have you seen a flat piece with green?" "I have a large red piece here that you may want." Great communication enables you to move faster and more successfully.
Celebrate the finished product. Hopefully, upon completion, you do not ignore the completed puzzle, but instead celebrate its success. So should you with every successful completion in the New Year!.
Like it? Share it!
Brent Frerichs is the author of "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" available for e-readers, tablets and PCs from Amazon Kindle - now just 2.99. Or, if you are a member of Amazon Prime, you can read this book for free.
Start with a framework. It's a good idea that most people begin a jigsaw by trying to put together the framework first. . .the same is true at work. Before beginning anything, put together the framework, or the foundation, that will house your work. Determine the parameters and systems that you will need. . .and you will have a much easier time solving the puzzle. (Also realize that, similar to a jigsaw puzzle, some of the framework that you thought belonged one place - truly belongs in another - in other words - be flexible!)
Sort through the issues. Most everyone sorts the pieces before putting the puzzle together. So it is with work. . .find the likenesses, the things that go together and the similarities will let you to move forward.
Turn the elements around. My experience with jigsaws is that I will look at several pieces one way for quite awhile. . .and it isn't until I turn them around that I begin to see how they fit together. I have found the same to be true in the workplace. We can stare at the same old situation for a long time, but it isn't until we start to turn it around, and look at it differently, that we are able to make progress.
Keep the big picture in focus. While trying to solve a jigsaw, how often do you refer to the master picture of the entire puzzle put together? Same should be true with teams - always keep the big picture in mind as you put together the small pieces that build a bigger element.
Working together helps you solve the puzzle faster. Enough said.
Communication is key to success. "Have you seen a flat piece with green?" "I have a large red piece here that you may want." Great communication enables you to move faster and more successfully.
Celebrate the finished product. Hopefully, upon completion, you do not ignore the completed puzzle, but instead celebrate its success. So should you with every successful completion in the New Year!.
Like it? Share it!
Brent Frerichs is the author of "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" available for e-readers, tablets and PCs from Amazon Kindle - now just 2.99. Or, if you are a member of Amazon Prime, you can read this book for free.
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