You know this to be true. You board the plane and the flight attendant who is responsible for your safety for the next four and a half hours looks as happy as a crustacean at Red Lobster - it's going to be a looooooooooong flight. Or, the flight attendant looks like they are genuinely happy to see you - suddenly your life is easier and so is theirs.
Or how about the person behind the counter at the fast food place who looks really irritated because you are interrupting their ritual of wiping yesterday's ketchup off of trays vs. the person who greets you with a smile?
Or what about your boss - don't you feel better when you sense they are actually happy to see you and happy to be at work?
One of the things that we can do to make life easier, both for our teams and for ourselves, is so simple. Be happy to be here. As a leader, you set the tone not only for the workplace, but for your sense of ownership. Isn't it better to be happy? Doesn't it make work a better place to be?
Happiness is not sappy. Happiness is a genuine, positive characteristic. It doesn't mean you can' t be serious and it certainly doesn't mean that you aren't working hard. In fact, some of the happiest people I know are, in fact, the hardest workers.
Happiness means you are bringing some of your best attributes to the workplace and actively sharing them with others. Besides a positive demeanor, it a judicious degree of social sharing, the ability to laugh at foibles and bonding over both near-misses and terrific wins.
And here's the thing - if you have a happy workplace - your job has suddenly become so much easier.
Work hard. . .play hard. . .and be happy.
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My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available on Amazon Kindle.
Friday, July 29, 2016
Friday, July 22, 2016
Breaking That Hard Line
In amongst all of the convention rhetoric this past week - there stands a story that truly is newsworthy. In Wichita, the Black Lives Matter movement was planning a protest march. Certainly it would play out like most: members of the Black Lives Matter community marching - with police standing by "just in case." Very little communication - no resolution. As one news report named it, "That Hard Line."
Wichita, however, broke convention. Members of Black Lives Matter and police officials met. Instead of a march - they had a cookout! A cookout! Members of law enforcement and Black Lives Matter broke bread together. . .and played hoops together. . .and danced together. . .and there are selfies to prove it!
Wichita broke that hard line.
Instead of one faction protesting and another faction policing. . .we were given community that worked together and played together in an effort to find common ground. Police listened, fielded difficult questions and established rapport with the community. The community, instead of taking that hard line of "we're protesting and nobody is going to change that," broke their protocol so that they could partner in building that all important rapport.
And if you read carefully, it wasn't just members of Black Lives Matter that attended. At one table we had representatives from the police, the African American community and the Hispanic American community.
Wichita broke that hard line.
Let's face it - breaking the hard line is often more work that maintaining it. It is easier for two factions to stand in opposite corners and build animosity. But for what purpose? It solves nothing.
Whether it is race relations in America, international conflict or office politics. . .let's break with convention. Let's sit down together. Let's discuss. Let's play hoops and dance and take selfies.
Let's break that hard line.
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My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available on Amazon Kindle.
Wichita, however, broke convention. Members of Black Lives Matter and police officials met. Instead of a march - they had a cookout! A cookout! Members of law enforcement and Black Lives Matter broke bread together. . .and played hoops together. . .and danced together. . .and there are selfies to prove it!
Wichita broke that hard line.
Instead of one faction protesting and another faction policing. . .we were given community that worked together and played together in an effort to find common ground. Police listened, fielded difficult questions and established rapport with the community. The community, instead of taking that hard line of "we're protesting and nobody is going to change that," broke their protocol so that they could partner in building that all important rapport.
And if you read carefully, it wasn't just members of Black Lives Matter that attended. At one table we had representatives from the police, the African American community and the Hispanic American community.
Wichita broke that hard line.
Let's face it - breaking the hard line is often more work that maintaining it. It is easier for two factions to stand in opposite corners and build animosity. But for what purpose? It solves nothing.
Whether it is race relations in America, international conflict or office politics. . .let's break with convention. Let's sit down together. Let's discuss. Let's play hoops and dance and take selfies.
Let's break that hard line.
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My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available on Amazon Kindle.
Friday, July 15, 2016
Turning Conflict Into Your Advantage (Surprise!)
For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.
Obviously this is a true statement. What I have found in workplace conflict, however, is that it's more like "For every action, there is a similar reaction that is often larger than the initial action." Hence. . .escalation of conflict.
Which, hopefully, is not something we want. Unfortunately, it is something that has been culturally built in to many workplaces (and politics). Firmly rooted into "an eye for an eye," when people shoot a verbal bullet - they are conditioned to expect a verbal grenade in return.
So, what if you do something different? What if you did something smarter? Don't respond the way they expect you to. Let's play out a scenario. Team member says something akin to: "your team (pointing a finger in your face) isn't organized, isn't effective and frankly is the worst-run team in the company." This real-housewives phraseology is such that it warrants a fighting response - and that is probably exactly what the accuser wants. Don't give them a fight - give them an honest response that they don't expect. Such as:
"I'm really sorry that you feel that way. I may not share your opinion - but I understand that you are passionate about this. How about this? Let's set up an appointment in three days and if you could bring specific examples to the meeting - then let's sit down and discuss. Maybe we could even have coffee?" This does several things: acknowledges the concern, sets a specific time to discuss, asks for specific facts. . .and seriously (?!) extends an olive branch for coffee. Strategically, is this what the accuser expected? Oh no. Does it give you an honest advantage in the discussion? Oh yeah.
Here's the point: the honest, but unexpected response in the face of conflict often diffuses the situation to your advantage. You are not responding as expected (but you are responding smartly), it throws the complainant off their game and buys you time to honestly look at the situation that's presented.
One of the things that gives me joy in the workplace is the break from the routine, the things that are surprises. Use this one to your advantage.
Like it? Share it!
My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available on Amazon Kindle.
Obviously this is a true statement. What I have found in workplace conflict, however, is that it's more like "For every action, there is a similar reaction that is often larger than the initial action." Hence. . .escalation of conflict.
Which, hopefully, is not something we want. Unfortunately, it is something that has been culturally built in to many workplaces (and politics). Firmly rooted into "an eye for an eye," when people shoot a verbal bullet - they are conditioned to expect a verbal grenade in return.
So, what if you do something different? What if you did something smarter? Don't respond the way they expect you to. Let's play out a scenario. Team member says something akin to: "your team (pointing a finger in your face) isn't organized, isn't effective and frankly is the worst-run team in the company." This real-housewives phraseology is such that it warrants a fighting response - and that is probably exactly what the accuser wants. Don't give them a fight - give them an honest response that they don't expect. Such as:
"I'm really sorry that you feel that way. I may not share your opinion - but I understand that you are passionate about this. How about this? Let's set up an appointment in three days and if you could bring specific examples to the meeting - then let's sit down and discuss. Maybe we could even have coffee?" This does several things: acknowledges the concern, sets a specific time to discuss, asks for specific facts. . .and seriously (?!) extends an olive branch for coffee. Strategically, is this what the accuser expected? Oh no. Does it give you an honest advantage in the discussion? Oh yeah.
Here's the point: the honest, but unexpected response in the face of conflict often diffuses the situation to your advantage. You are not responding as expected (but you are responding smartly), it throws the complainant off their game and buys you time to honestly look at the situation that's presented.
One of the things that gives me joy in the workplace is the break from the routine, the things that are surprises. Use this one to your advantage.
Like it? Share it!
My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available on Amazon Kindle.
Friday, July 8, 2016
At Our Core
Assuredly, I understand, even endorse, performance based appraisals. "Sam sold 10,000 units, kept his marketing dollars 5% under budget and improved his margin by 3%. Sam's a winner!" Got it.
Too often, however, we focus (either as managers or as contributors) solely on these metrics; sadly, we neglect the true core of the individual (be it another person or ourselves.)
There must be something in the core of the individual that makes them a valuable asset. Let me suggest a critical few: honesty, integrity, loyalty, caring, teamwork, selflessness. We should recognize and reward these as much as performance.
If we are all about performance metrics, but neglect the core of the individual, we have failed as business leaders and as human beings; while there may be short-term success, the long-term is not promising.
Here's what happens if we neglect our core. Let's say that Sally is recognized for producing 5,000 widgets a day. We emphasize over and over again to Sally how valuable she is because she produces 5,000 widgets a day. Sally buys in completely and recognizes, above all else, how valuable she is because she produces 5,000 widgets a day. Then, Sally breaks her arm and can't produce any widgets. Now what happens to Sally's worth in the company? What happens to Sally's own sense of worth?
Let's say that Sally has a strong core. She works smartly. She is honest. She gets her team through the most difficult of circumstances. When Sally can no longer produce 5,000 widgets, have we recognized these other strengths (aside from performance metrics) and can we use this valuable person in another, and perhaps more important role? Can Sally herself recognize the value she brings to the team without production and honor her own commitment to the work and her fellow workers?
I do believe that it is more difficult to manage to a solid core and metrics vs. just the latter. It is more difficult because it requires that we make judgments. It is also more rewarding. We are not only building stronger and more versatile teams, but we are also building better team members.
Like it? Share it!
My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available on Amazon Kindle.
Too often, however, we focus (either as managers or as contributors) solely on these metrics; sadly, we neglect the true core of the individual (be it another person or ourselves.)
There must be something in the core of the individual that makes them a valuable asset. Let me suggest a critical few: honesty, integrity, loyalty, caring, teamwork, selflessness. We should recognize and reward these as much as performance.
If we are all about performance metrics, but neglect the core of the individual, we have failed as business leaders and as human beings; while there may be short-term success, the long-term is not promising.
Here's what happens if we neglect our core. Let's say that Sally is recognized for producing 5,000 widgets a day. We emphasize over and over again to Sally how valuable she is because she produces 5,000 widgets a day. Sally buys in completely and recognizes, above all else, how valuable she is because she produces 5,000 widgets a day. Then, Sally breaks her arm and can't produce any widgets. Now what happens to Sally's worth in the company? What happens to Sally's own sense of worth?
Let's say that Sally has a strong core. She works smartly. She is honest. She gets her team through the most difficult of circumstances. When Sally can no longer produce 5,000 widgets, have we recognized these other strengths (aside from performance metrics) and can we use this valuable person in another, and perhaps more important role? Can Sally herself recognize the value she brings to the team without production and honor her own commitment to the work and her fellow workers?
I do believe that it is more difficult to manage to a solid core and metrics vs. just the latter. It is more difficult because it requires that we make judgments. It is also more rewarding. We are not only building stronger and more versatile teams, but we are also building better team members.
Like it? Share it!
My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available on Amazon Kindle.
Friday, July 1, 2016
If it Ain't Fair, It Ain't Great
A few days ago, in talking about trade, Donald Trump said this: "I want great deals. I don’t care if they’re free. I don’t care if they’re fair. I don’t care if they’re good. I don’t care if they’re horrendous. I just want great deals. I’ll do it all different ways.”
How very early-1980's. You know, The Despicable Age when everyone was expendable and it was profit at any cost, baby.
Gratefully, the world has moved on - well, at least most of the world. I am struck especially by this in the quote, "I don't care if they're fair."
All of us, especially leaders, must be concerned with fairness; in each decision we make we must strive for the important ethical goal of treating all equally. Why? Because simply put it is the right thing to do; it is the ethical thing to do.
And as is the case with many things, because it is the right thing to do it creates many side benefits.
Unfair treatment, in its very nature, creates a deliberately lopsided playing field. Someone is at a disadvantage. While that may be seemingly justified in terms of securing a short-term win; that win is quickly tainted with the idea that the winning side didn't play as aggressively, as hard, as honestly as they could because they had an unfair advantage. On the other side, it creates belligerence and ill-will that will evidence itself for days and years to come.
When things are fair, the exact opposite happens. People need to play and work to their best. They win and lose honestly and they take that satisfaction and move on. There is no call for belligerence or disrespect because all have played by the rules and have been fair with one another.
Some will excuse unfair treatment with this (ahem) gem - "well, life isn't fair." Well, here's the thing - people who have that high level of disregard for life are probably miserable human beings because they can't see fairness to begin with. To be able to see equal and ethical treatment of all is a gift. It is a gift that we can all share. . .because we must be convicted and consistent with the idea that fairness is an integral part of greatness.
Like it? Share it!
My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available on Amazon Kindle.
How very early-1980's. You know, The Despicable Age when everyone was expendable and it was profit at any cost, baby.
Gratefully, the world has moved on - well, at least most of the world. I am struck especially by this in the quote, "I don't care if they're fair."
All of us, especially leaders, must be concerned with fairness; in each decision we make we must strive for the important ethical goal of treating all equally. Why? Because simply put it is the right thing to do; it is the ethical thing to do.
And as is the case with many things, because it is the right thing to do it creates many side benefits.
Unfair treatment, in its very nature, creates a deliberately lopsided playing field. Someone is at a disadvantage. While that may be seemingly justified in terms of securing a short-term win; that win is quickly tainted with the idea that the winning side didn't play as aggressively, as hard, as honestly as they could because they had an unfair advantage. On the other side, it creates belligerence and ill-will that will evidence itself for days and years to come.
When things are fair, the exact opposite happens. People need to play and work to their best. They win and lose honestly and they take that satisfaction and move on. There is no call for belligerence or disrespect because all have played by the rules and have been fair with one another.
Some will excuse unfair treatment with this (ahem) gem - "well, life isn't fair." Well, here's the thing - people who have that high level of disregard for life are probably miserable human beings because they can't see fairness to begin with. To be able to see equal and ethical treatment of all is a gift. It is a gift that we can all share. . .because we must be convicted and consistent with the idea that fairness is an integral part of greatness.
Like it? Share it!
My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available on Amazon Kindle.
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