Why "I'm in a pissy mood" May Be Okay

I've come to the conclusion that "I'm in a pissy mood" may be, in rare instances, an okay leadership statement.  (Well, okay, maybe not said  exactly like that - something akin to  "Not having the best day - so if my energy seems low - don't take it personal"  will suffice.)

Under the header of "none of us are perfect (no matter how much we may like to believe we are)" we all have bad days.    To own it, and admit it to the workforce, is actually a very strong action.

To pretend that we aren't in a bad mood (when we really are) does both our team and us a disservice.  The energy it takes to  slap on a plastic mask of "gee-what-a-great-day" is usually not well spent.   Teams see through that type of artifice (and if they can't you are seriously Oscar-worthy).

There are a few caveats here.    Being good human beings, we probably should probably use this advice on the very rare occasion  (because, truly, there is so much to be thankful for).    If it's a daily occurrence, you are in the wrong profession.   Or need a Xanax.  Or both.

Also - admitting to being in a "state" does not give you license for a personal day of "reign of terror."  It does not give you license to spew forth all of the snarky comments you've held inside for the past 19 years.

Here's what the statement does accomplish.

• If you are in a bad mood - you don't need to fake it.  You can honestly own it.  From my own personal experience - somehow that makes it better.     The day goes better if you just say "You know what - not at my best - I'm just going to work with that."
• You have given your team a frame of reference.   If you are not your usual smiling, friendly, let-me-win-Mr.-Ms.-Congeniality self; they know why.    Because you have given them a reason - they won't take it personally.   If you don't own up to it - people will key into your mood and instinctively start to wonder what they did.   When this happens, the entire team starts to turn upside down.
• When you own it - it will change the way the team interacts with you on that day.     They are less likely to bring up the non-urgent, but irritating stuff that is embedded in daily work.    That helps you.  As a side benefit, if the team takes it upon themselves to manage those little irritating things, without involving you, then you've all learned a good lesson.

Often leaders are Superwoman and Superman.   But we are also human, with human emotions and needs.   That means that the rare day is not as good as the rest.  Own it.  Admit it.   And yes, you can even lead with it.

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My book "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available for e-readers, tablets and PCs on Amazon Kindle.