The Ultimate Control

Perhaps I should have explained myself a long time ago.   Much of the content of "Strength in Leadership"  suggests ways that leaders can change to be more effective;   I spend considerably less time on how leaders can try to change others.

Why?

I've learned, through many different lessons in life, that it is far more impactful to effect change by changing one's own behavior as opposed to imposing one's will on another individual.

Here's the thing.   Human beings are wondrous creatures in that we have the ability to adapt and change and be flexible. . .unfortunately, often we forget about those great traits within a leadership context.   We often wish that we could snap our fingers and another person would magically change. . .and the truth is that the closest we have to that concept. . .is changing our own behavior.

This requires that we approach the workforce with an open mind;   our toolbox should include creativity and versatility.     In order to change our own approach, we have to observe others and understand not only how they react to us, but to other members of the team.  We have to be willing to put ourselves out there to make mistakes so that we come to the formulas that work for specific team members.

I fear that it is often out of laziness, or worst yet, fear, that leaders want everyone around them to change yet are unwilling to change themselves.      There are those who claim it is principle or integrity that disallows them from altering their behavior for the benefit of the team members.   Unfortunately, they are confusing those very valuable characteristics with stubbornness.

Outside of the workplace, we have found it successful to alter our approaches by situation and by individual.   Most of us do not talk to our banker the same way we talk to our best friend.  We probably approach our parents differently than we approach our children.    Our conversations with a casual acquaintance are far different than the ones we have with a trusted confidant.

Work should be no different.  To be the most effective, we need to change how we act, react and interact with our team;   it is those actions that will make the most difference in how the team acts, reacts and interacts with us.

The most vital power we have is not the will that we try to impose on others;   it is the strength, determination and the ability to adapt that we have within ourselves.

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My book, "Courageous Questions, Confident Leaders" is available for e-readers, tablets and PCs on Amazon Kindle.